How to Handle a Bully at School

So, how do you handle a bully at school? Consequently, it can be physical, emotional or psychological. It can occur between friends or within groups, either in-person or online. All things considered, bullying can be overt and direct, with physical behavior such as fighting, hitting or name-calling, or it can be covert, with social interactions such as gossip or exclusion.

Depending on how bad the bullying is (and as long as you don’t feel at risk, scared or physically threatened) you might want to try and work it out yourself – as a first step.

Therefore, the more empowered you are, and the more you can help yourself, the better chance you have to stop the bully.

Besides, if the bully doesn’t change their behavior, that’s when talking to someone else can be really helpful.

The bully wants you to react. In short, their goal is to take away your power, make you sad and scared. And if you show them you are not sad and scared, they will often lose interest and they cannot take away your power.

Therefore, remember they want to upset you constantly so you get angry. If you don’t get angry, the bully will lose their own power.

Ways to Handle the Bully at School

In reality, bullies look for a reaction from you and often lose interest if they aren’t given the satisfaction of getting one.

If You Feel Safe, Here Are Some Ways To Handle The Bully:

In any event, walk away when the bully approaches you. Try and imagine you’re walking away from a stranger. Both you and your body language will show you don’t care.
Given that, concentrate on thinking about something else (maybe a concert you want to go to, or a new outfit you want to buy.)
When the bully approaches you, count to 100 and keep walking. They’ll never see how upset you are.
Yelling STOP and walk away. Nonetheless, keep walking and don’t turn around no matter what they say.
When a bully calls you a name or tells you your sneakers are ugly — look at them in the eyes and laugh hysterically and say, “I know my sneakers are ugly.” Keep laughing hysterically and walk away without any additional conversation
When the bully harasses you and calls you names, look them in the eyes, LAUGH and walk away without any additional conversation.

Some great comeback lines to handle the bully at school are:

  • Whatever!
  • Do you feel better now?
  • If you’re talking about me behind my back, clearly my life is a lot more interesting than yours is!
  • Let’s move on!
  • You finally found something funny to say?
  • I’m not sure why you keep saying these things about me, but I don’t care.
  • Be really cool and stop this!
  • Enough!
  • Why are you talking to me?
  • Here we go again. This is boring. Let me know when you’re done.
  • I’ve been called worse from better.
  • Wow, did you come up with that all by yourself?
  • Pardon me, but you seem to think that I care.

Meanwhile, once you give your comeback line — IT’S SO IMPORTANT to just walk away and keep walking! Do not react or respond. That’s what the bully wants!

When you walk away you’re taking away the bully’s power! That’s how you handle a bully at school.

Stay Positive
In this situation, it can be hard to remember all your good points when someone is doing their best to be negative. However, try to think of all the things you do well and remember that you are a valuable person. Thinking of how bad the bully must be feeling may also help you to stay positive.

Picture Your Bully Like This…
Picture your bully standing on their head with their body stretching – almost as if they were standing in front of a distorted mirror like the kind you see at a carnival. In the meantime, listen to their voice as it comes out all distorted and warbled. And they’ve turned yellow with pink stripes. Now who’s laughing?

Build An Armored Shield Around You
Visualize a tall armored shield. At the same time, build that shield around you and when it’s up, imagine all the things the bully is saying bouncing off that armored shield.

Be Confident
By the same token, bullies usually pick on people that they think are weaker than they are, so stand up to them. You might be scared but if you keep standing up to them they’ll stop.

Other ways to conquer your bully and throw them off track:

  • By loudly saying “leave me alone”
  • Say something funny
  • Look them in the eye and be nice to them
  • Keep out of the bully’s way

Even more, if you are afraid of your bully avoid places where your bully hangs out, or take a different route to school. If the bully doesn’t see you, they can’t bully you.

Use The Buddy System Against Bullies
Bullies feel empowered to bully one person, but rarely will they bully a group. Therefore, hang out with your friends. If the bully does feel like conquering the group, walk away.

If after using these tactics and the bullying doesn’t stop, it may be time to ask for help. At length, don’t be afraid to let someone know that you are being bullied. There are people who care about you and will help you.

Get Help – Tell An Adult About the Bully
It may seem scary to tell someone but, telling will not only get you help, it will make you feel less afraid. By all means, if you are being physically bullied and are in danger you must speak with a trusted adult immediately. And if you can’t go to your parents, seek out a trusted teacher guidance counselor or school psychologist.

Furthermore, if you’ve told a grown-up before and they haven’t done anything about it, tell someone else. Tell them exactly what happened, who did the bullying, where and when it happened, how long it’s been happening to you, and how it’s making you feel. When you tell your teacher, guidance counselor or school psychologist, ask them what they will do to help stop the bullying. It is their job to help keep you safe. For one thing, most adults really care about bullying and will do everything they can to help you. Keep telling until someone does help you! That’s also how to handle a bully at school.

DO NOT…

  • Firstly, think it’s your fault. Bullying is for cowards!
  • Fight back or bully a person back
  • Keep it to yourself and just hope the bullying will “go away.” Make sure you report the bullying.
  • Skip school or avoid school or afterschool activities because you’re afraid of the bully
  • Be afraid to tell. Telling is NOT tattling! It’s the right thing to do!
  • Finally, hurt yourself. Nothing is that hopeless that it can’t be resolved. As painful as bullying is, NOTHING is ever that bad that you should hurt yourself in any way.

Nonetheless, bullying affects everyone—not just the person being bullied.

People who are bullied may experience anxiety and depression, making it hard to eat, sleep, and maintain a functioning social life. Given that, fear, isolation, constant worry—all often the result of bullying.

In brief, bullies need help and support too. Sometimes bullies engage in violent and abusive behavior in conjunction with substance abuse, fighting, and criminal activity.

There is a relationship between bullying and suicide. But, like anything, it’s complicated. Hence, people who experience bullying may experience anxiety and depression, increasing their risk of feeling suicidal.

Experts say there are many effective ways to handle bullying at school, so long as parents, teachers and administrators work together to create a safe and inclusive environment. Also to confront problems when they arise. So, hopefully these are some good points to consider when handling a bully at school.

You never know who might need Crisis Text Line. Pass it on and tell the people in your life to text HOME to 741741 if they’re ever in crisis.

-How parents, teachers, and kids can take action to prevent bullying

https://www.apa.org/topics/bullying/prevent

-Dealing With Bullies

https://kidshealth.org/en/kids/bullies.html

-My Child Is a Bully: What Should I Do?

https://childmind.org/article/what-to-do-if-your-child-is-bullying

Have a Good One,

Cindee Murphy, One Voice in the Vastness of Emotions

“You may not control all the events that happen to you, but you can decide not to be reduced by them.” —Maya Angelou

Effect of Bullying(Opens in a new browser tab)

Am I Being Bullied ?(Opens in a new browser tab)

Bullying Adalah (Is) A Coward’s Way To Feel Superior(Opens in a new browser tab)

Bullying In School(Opens in a new browser tab)

https://www.crisistextline.org/topics/bullying/#bystander-effect-9

https://www.stompoutbullying.org/how-to-deal-with-bullies

https://www.usnews.com/education/k12/articles/how-to-handle-bullying-at-school

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About Me

Hi, I’m Cindee, the creator and author behind one voice in the vastness of emotions. I’ve been dealing with depression and schizophrenia for three decades. I’ve been combating anxiety for ten years. Mental illnesses have such a stigma behind them that it gets frustrating. People believe that’s all you are, but you’re so much more. You can strive to be anything you want without limitations. So, be kind.

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