I must be considered a high-functioning anxiety individual because I am still driving. A lot of people who are suffering with anxiety, are fearful of driving anymore. Therefore, to me, I would be giving up my independence if I gave up driving. Consequently, I have anxiety while I’m driving, so I make a consiencsous effort to pay more attention to my driving then I have in the past. I have fears of something happening to me while I’m driving and my brain blows the anxiety way out of control. I’m fearful of situations that I have no control over. My mind just runs away with all the possibilities that could happen. Although, somehow I am still able to drive everywhere. No wonder, you become fatigued (emotionally and physically) from all the anxiety.

Other Drivers

I’m always afraid of what the other drivers MIGHT do! I emphasize “might” because it is so far fetched and most likely will never happen (but part of me thinks it “could” happen). Subsequently, I have little trust in other drivers. Not that I had trust in them before, but now I’m paranoid! That’s one thing with anxiety, you trust less and less people. Even so, sometimes you don’t trust yourself (especially when driving). Doubt starts to creep in and then BAM, it takes over your life. However, I can still remember the day when I felt the full force of the anxiety. Anyway, getting back to driving with anxiety and other drivers. I have all these scenes in my head of what other drivers might do. Being that, I’m constantly on “high alert.” Sometimes, I wonder if I should even be driving.

Getting Into An Accident

I have this vision of me getting into a serious accident and I’m trapped in the car. I’m so paralyzed with fear that I can’t get out. In another case, I run off the road into a tree. I saw something like this on the news, a teenager went off the road and struck a tree. She was killed instantly because a branch had impaled her through the neck and severed a major artery. I wouldn’t wish that on anybody or myself. In any case, it did happen to someone. I think my fear of hitting a tree stems from hearing about that. The anxiety is really bad during bad weather.

Weather Is Bad

Most everybody hates driving in bad weather, especially when the road is wet or iced over. I just received new tires for my car, but they are still not gripping the road properly. They spin out if I step on the gas a little too much (even just a little bit). I am especially anxious when it rains and during the winter. Here are a couple of the reasons why I try to avoid driving in these conditions:

Most everybody hates driving in bad weather, especially when the road is wet or iced over. I just received new tires for my car, but they are still not gripping the road properly. They spin out if I step on the gas a little too much (even just a little bit). I am especially anxious when it rains and during the winter. Here are a couple of the reasons why I try to avoid driving in these conditions

When It Rains

Like I said earlier, even if it rains just a little bit, the tires spin out even though they are new. Then, of course, my mind spins all these wild scenarios that could happen. It’s a wonder, while this is going on, how I am able to still drive. Some might even consider me to be the hazard in the roadway because I’m trying to pay attention to every frickin thing. That alone, will make you go nuts!

In The Winter

I seriously do not like driving in the winter for obvious reasons. Therefore, it makes it more difficult when you add anxiety on top of that. Likewise, I’ve become a very defensive driver when people are following too close to me. They don’t need to be right up on your bumper, especially when there is ice on the road.

Car Breaking Down

I think everybody has the fear of the car breaking down, especially when you’re in the middle of nowhere. Anybody could kidnap you and nobody would know. See how my mind works (a little too much). I still have these thoughts even though the majority of them are not plausible (or a little out there). I would be the first to admit it. You brain makes up these ideas, thinking it’s helping, but in hindsight, it is just making it worse.

Running Out Of Gas

You ever have that feeling you’re out in the middle of nowhere and you run out of gas? I’m one of those people who constantly watch the gas gauge, so it doesn’t go on empty. Been in that position before, I don’t intend to do that again. At any rate, I was extremely anxious that day and that just made my day when I ran out of gas. Consequently, I make sure I have enough money for gas if I ever do run out again.

Driving On Tollway

I get especially nervous when I’m driving on the tollway. Firstly, everybody drives like a f**king maniac. It’s like they have something really important to do and God forgive if you get in their way. Secondly, I don’t trust people who drive way faster than the speed limit. Thirdly, I don’t trust them if they’re weaving in a nd out of traffic. It’s like they don’t care how recklessly they’re driving. I know this can happen anywhere, but the speed on the tollway is much higher, therefore, they can cause a more serious accident. I end up driving around the lowest speed possible or take the long way to my destination.

Hitting The Curb

Whether I’m driving along or making a turn, I always feel like I’m going to hit a curb. You should see me making a turn, I’m fifty million feet from the curb because I’m afraid of hitting it. In other words, I make really wide turns. I mean, you can screw up a car if you consistently run over curbs. I’m trying to get those who don’t suffer from anxiety, to see, those with extreme anxiety, how their mind works. It takes the smallest piece of evidence (or nothing at all) and construes it into a major event. Then you sit there worrying over and over about it, when it probably will never come true.

Driving Into A Ditch

I always have this premonition that I swerve off the road, into a ditch. That has never happened to me in all the times I have sat behind the wheel. I’m not saying it won’t happen because I deem myself as a defensive driver. I’m very aware of my surroundings and what’s going on around me. I also see myself leaving the road because I was trying to avoid hitting an animal. In any event, I end up in a body of water. You know where this is going, don’t you? No, I wasn’t trying to hurt myself. Nonetheless, water does start to fill up in the car. I’ll leave it at that.

Conclusion

I force myself to go places or to be in situations where my anxiety might be high because I want to meet it head-on and not have it control every aspect of my life. I might as well give up living then. So, I permit myself to go to these places, but I only spend around ten minutes there. If I’m having a good day (anxiety is low), I’ll stay in the store a little bit longer. So yeah, I force myself into the car before I have time to think about it. If I sat around and thought about going, I would never leave. I don’t give my brain a chance to react to a “perceived” threat that really isn’t true. All these scenerios have crossed my mind at one point or another. I kid you not!

Some of the coping strategies that I use are deep breathing, CBT, and avoiding drinking too much caffeine. I know, contrarily as this sounds, if I gave up caffeine completely, I would be the most anxious person in the world. I have tried it before (several times) and I had to go back to drinking it because the anxiety was something that I couldn’t handle. Since then, I’ve learned what my threshold is and only drink that for the day. So, if you have givin up driving for a while, I don’t blame you. It takes a courageous person, who suffers from anxiety, to continue to drive. Well, I hope you feel less anxious each and every day forward!

Articles

-What To Know About Systematic Desensitization

https://www.webmd.com/anxiety-panic/what-to-know-systematic-desensitization-therapy

-Panic Disorder And Panic Atttacks

https://www.webmd.com/anxiety-panic/mental-health-panic-disorder

-Generalized Anxiety Disorder

https://www.webmd.com/anxiety-panic/generalized-anxiety-disorder

Have A Good One,

Cindee, One Voice – Unstoppable

“You’re not alone!”