What is thanatophobia, you may ask? Tanatophobia is a type of anxiety disorder characterized by a persistent and irrational fear of death or afraid to die. Therefore, people with thanatophobia may experience extreme anxiety, panic attacks, and avoidance behaviors related to death, dying, or serious illness. Another name for this condition is “death anxiety.” You might be anxious about your own death or the death of someone you care about.

Equally, the fear of losing someone is another aspect of thanatophobia. Few common causes that may build fear of loss in us is the fear of losing someone, separation including divorce, betrayal, war, cheating, insecurity, hereditary, illness or some other mental illnesses like depression. Concurrently, this fear impacts our behaviours as well. This fear of this loss can creep in our head before taking an action and sometimes after the action is taken.

“Carry out a random act of kindness, with no expectation of reward, safe in the knowledge that one day, someone might do the same for you.” —Diana, Princess of Wales

Fear of Losing Someone You Love

To start, let’s be clear about an important distinction. Comparatively, there are two major types of anxiety about a loved one’s death:

When a loved one has a severe illness or is at high risk of dying, and you are anxious about their impending death.

When your loved ones are not particularly at risk for dying, but you can’t stop worrying about them dying anyway.

What’s more, these two types of anxiety are very different and require different responses.

Scenario 1: Worrying when a loved one is at a higher-than-usual risk of dying. To clarify, make sure your natural anxiety and grief don’t turn into a state of paralysis or preoccupation. Therefore, it may be time to take some steps if you find yourself:

• Unable to engage in proper self-care.
• Unable to manage the basics in life.
• So preoccupied with thoughts about your loved one’s death that you can’t enjoy your time with them now.

Scenario 2: Worrying about someone’s death when they’re unlikely to die.
That is to say, have you ever worried about someone’s death so intensely that by the time they walked in the door and explained they were late because of car troubles you’d worked yourself into a panic? Another common reason for preoccupation with a loved one’s unlikely death is generalized anxiety disorder (GAD). To conclude, people with this disorder spend a lot of time worrying about bad things happening, to the point where it interferes with their day-to-day functions.

“We are all in the gutter, but some of us are looking at the stars.” —Oscar Wilde, author

Fear Of Dying

Fear of death is a phobia, and like other phobias it does have a special name: thanatophobia. That is, fear of death or fear of mortality is easy to define: it’s the fear of the end of life.

Okay, if you’re saying that not wanting to die is a rational fear, you’re not wrong. But what about when it becomes irrational, or when the fear becomes so invasive and oppressive that it keeps you from enjoying the time you do have? To emphasize, that fear of death is something we don’t want — and it’s turned into anxiety about death. Hence, terminally ill individuals of all ages may also experience a form of modified thanatophobia.

Death anxiety also tends to affect some people more severely, based on a variety of mental health factors. Not to mention, fear of death may more intensely affect people who are experiencing mental disorders or who may be dealing with the following:

• Poor health
• Low self-esteem
• Lack of fighting spirit
• Lack of religious beliefs
• Lack of intimacy in relationships
• Lack of fulfillment

“We build too many walls and not enough bridges.” —Isaac Newton, mathematician

Child Fears Death

On the whole, anxiety and distress about death is a common fear for young children and teens. For most kids, this fear will gradually diminish as they grow, gain new experiences, and acquire different coping skills. A more severe fear of death, however, may require professional intervention.

On the negative side, children with thanatophobia experience intense anxiety and fear in response to thoughts of death. As a result, they often experience physical symptoms of fear, such as:

• Chest pain
• Chills
• Dizziness
• Nausea
• Racing heartbeat
• Shallow, rapid breathing
• Sweating
• Trembling
• Upset stomach

Other common signs and symptoms include avoiding threatening situations, constantly asking for reassurance, clinging to a parent or caregiver, and obsessing about minor health complaints.

“The only thing worse than being blind is having sight but no vision.” —Helen Keller, author

How to Overcome Fear of Losing

On the whole, fears of loss are not only extremely painful, but can negatively affect your entire life. They affect your self-worth, your self-image, your relationships, and possibly even your job and lifestyle. Therefore, if you’re very afraid of goodbyes, then you should definitely follow our 10 tips to overcome loss fears step by step:

• Find triggers & causes
• Break thought patterns: If you think positive perhaps things would be quite different. Because then you would be more relaxed and would also transfer this to your environment. Therefore break through your negative thought patterns.
• Strengthen your self-esteem
• Change your self-image
• Reduce your stress level
• Put the focus on the positive
• Communication: you need people in your life with whom you can talk openly about everything that’s on your mind
• Detach from dependencies: You make your happiness dependent on you! Of course, if you don’t, you make yourself emotionally dependent and thus only cause yourself additional harm in the long run.
• Understanding fear of loss
• Lastly, Coaching

“For every minute you are angry, you lose sixty seconds of happiness.” —Ralph Waldo Emerson, author

Conclusion

You have questions, is death scary? What is it like on the other side? Why am I afraid to die? On one hand, we all have had the fear of loosing someone. The unknown is waiting for us on the other side. But, what happens when you become so preoccupied with death (and the fear of it), you forget to live your life. Consequently, that’s what thanatophobia is. Even children can experience it.

Whereas, the acceptance of death is a worthwhile pursuit. The fact is: Life is short, and every day spent wasted worrying about what comes after is a day lost. Unquestionably, speaking with a healthcare professional about your anxiety can help you learn how to stop worry about death — and feel better for your days to come.

Articles

-What Next? How To Cope With The Fear Of Losing Someone

https://www.betterhelp.com/advice/love/how-to-cope-with-the-fear-of-losing-someone-you-love/

-Thanatophobia (Fear of Death) Explained

https://www.verywellmind.com/thanatophobia-2671879

-Overcoming fear of death

https://www.uktherapyguide.com/overcoming-fear-of-death

Have a Good One,

Cindee Murphy, One Voice – Unstoppable

“Start where you are. Use what you have. Do what you can.” —Arthur Ashe, American tennis player.

Related Posts

Panic Disorder Coping Skills(Opens in a new browser tab)

Phobia of Sleeping(Opens in a new browser tab)

Fear of Abandonment Phobia(Opens in a new browser tab)

Sources

Taylor C. B. (2006). Panic disorder. BMJ (Clinical research ed.), 332(7547), 951–955. Retrieved from https://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pmc/articles/PMC1444835/.

Anxiety disorders. (n.d.). Retrieved March 19, 2021, from https://www.nimh.nih.gov/health/topics/anxiety-disorders/index.shtml.

National Alliance on Mental Health. Anxiety disorders.

American Academy of Pediatrics. Understanding childhood fears and anxieties.