Endogenous Depression: When Your Mind Turns Against You

With endogenous depression: when your mind turns against you. Can you have endogenous depression and exogenous depression simultaneously? Genetics caused my depression, but also trauma as a child.

Genetically, I don’t know when it evolved. I was officially diagnosed at the age of sixteen. The trauma was by my first grade teacher for two years.

Endogenous depression, meaning is a type of depression believed to have a biological or genetic basis, rather than being primarily triggered by external factors or life events.

An endogenous depression example is an individual who experiences severe depressive symptoms without clear external triggers or recognizable life stressors. They may have a family history of depression, suggesting a potential genetic or biological tendency.

Causes of Endogenous Depression

Here are some primary causes associating this with endogenous depression:

Genetic Predisposition: A family history of depression or other mood disorders can increase the likelihood of developing endogenous depression, suggesting a hereditary component.
Hormonal Imbalance: Fluctuations in hormones, such as those that occur during puberty, pregnancy, postpartum, or menopause, can contribute to the onset of endogenous depression in some individuals.
Chronic Medical Conditions: Certain chronic illnesses, such as diabetes, cancer, or cardiovascular disease, can increase the risk of developing depression, particularly if they affect the brain or hormonal systems.
Inflammation: Some studies suggest that inflammation in the body may be linked to depression. Elevated levels of inflammatory markers have been observed in individuals with depression, indicating a potential connection.
Stress Response: An individual’s response to stress may also play a role. Some people may have a heightened sensitivity to stress that can trigger depressive episodes, even in the absence of external stressors.

With the stress response, it’s creating your own stress with your own mind. There doesn’t have to be external stress, especially from “fight-or-flight” responses to no harmful threat.

Endogenous Depression Symptoms

Endogenous depression: when your mind turns against you. Overall, endogenous depression, also known as major depressive disorder, is characterized by symptoms that arise from internal biological factors, rather than external circumstances.

Here are some common symptoms associated with endogenous depression:

Persistent Sadness: A deep, unshakeable feeling of sadness or emptiness that lasts for an extended period.
Loss of Interest: A marked decrease in interest or pleasure in activities that were once enjoyable, including hobbies, social interactions, and work.
Changes in Sleep Patterns: Insomnia (difficulty sleeping) or hypersomnia (sleeping too much) can occur, often disrupting normal sleep cycles.
Fatigue: A constant feeling of tiredness or lack of energy, even after adequate rest.
Cognitive Difficulties: Trouble concentrating, making decisions, or remembering details, often described as a “foggy” mind.
Feelings of Worthlessness or Guilt: Intense feelings of inadequacy or excessive guilt about past actions or perceived failures.
Recurrent Thoughts of Death or Suicide: Frequent thoughts about death, suicidal ideation, or attempts.

I had a lot of these symptoms 6 years ago. I lived in a crowded apartment with three cats. Emphatically, I had feelings of worthlessness and persistent sadness. I was lost in myself with self-pity. Everything seemed so hopeless, until I had had enough, and then I moved to start my life over.

Chronic Endogenous Depression

With endogenous depression: when your mind turns against you. Chronic endogenous depression can be particularly challenging, because it often lasts for years and may not respond well to typical treatments.

With endogenous depression: when your mind turns against you. Key features of chronic endogenous depression include:

Duration

Symptoms persist for an extended period, typically for two years or more. This distinguishes it from other forms of depression that may be more intermittent.

Back then, I believe I had rotten psychiatrists. Either they didn’t know what they were doing, or they were just plain mean. I had one who constantly yelled at me.

Biological Basis

Linkinig it to genetic, neurochemical, or hormonal imbalances in the brain. This indicates a more inherent cause, rather than being primarily influenced by environmental factors.

Symptoms

Similar to other forms of major depressive disorder, symptoms may include persistent sadness, anhedonia (loss of interest or pleasure), changes in appetite or sleep patterns, fatigue, feelings of worthlessness or guilt, and difficulty concentrating.

Resistance to Treatment

Chronic endogenous depression may be more resistant to conventional treatments, requiring a more comprehensive approach that can include medication (such as antidepressants), psychotherapy, lifestyle changes, and possibly alternative treatments.

Impact on Functioning

The chronic nature of this condition can significantly affect an individual’s daily life, relationships, and overall functioning.

I lost all my friends and family members who walked away from me. I was left with nobody but myself to bring me out of the endogenous depression. But slowly, I did it one day at a time.

Treatment for Endogenous Depression

Endogenous depression: when your mind turns against you. Here are 8 manageable goals for motivation out of endogenous depression:

1. Start with small, manageable goals
2. Stick to your routine
3. Engage in Opposite Action
4. Reframe unhelpful and negative thoughts
5. Use behavioral activation
6. Connect with a supportive environment
7. Reward yourself for small steps
8. Seek professional help for depression and motivation

1. Start with small, manageable goals

Depression can often make us feel overwhelmed. Even tasks that are “easy” on the surface may feel unbeatable when you’re in a depressive episode.

For example, you might typically keep your house tidy. But when you’re facing depression symptoms, even keeping one area clean might feel completely overwhelming.

To combat this, keep your goals small and realistic. A goal of “washing the dishes” may be difficult to gather motivation for when you’re depressed. Smaller steps might be to put all of the dishes in the sink, clear the dishwasher, or wash just one dish.

Once you have your list of manageable goals, start with the smallest and easiest ones.

You might be tempted to get the harder steps out of the way first, and if you’re feeling motivated enough to do so, then you can try this. But generally, starting with the easiest steps helps you gain a sense of mastery and accomplishment. This can help you feel more confident to tackle the other, more challenging goals on your list.

Revisiting the example above, if gathering all the dishes in the sink feels too overwhelming, start with something easier, like clearing the dishwasher.

If it’s still difficult to feel motivated, start with something even more manageable, like taking just one dish out of the dishwasher.

2. Stick to your routine

Having a healthy routine and sticking to it can be immensely helpful during a depressive episode.

Routines consist of habits, and habits are behaviors that you can repeat without even thinking about it. When you’re depressed, it’s typically easier to stick to a familiar routine than to implement new habits.

It’s best to start building a healthy routine when you’re not in a depressive episode. Fill your regular daily routine with healthy habits, like taking a walk after work, journaling in the morning.

Also, winding down for bed an hour before you go to sleep, and calling friends on certain days.

3. Engage in Opposite Action

Opposite Action is a technique from dialectical behavior therapy (DBT), which is an evidence-based treatment method for people facing severe depression and suicidal thoughts.

This technique teaches you how to regulate your emotions by changing your behavior.

The basis of Opposite Action is that every emotion comes with an “action urge.”

For example, if you feel afraid, you may have the urge to run away. If you feel angry, you may feel the urge to yell or attack. If you’re ashamed, you may feel the urge to hide.

In Opposite Action, you can change the emotion by acting in a way that’s the direct opposite to the action urge.

When you feel depressed, the action urges may be to self-isolate, to stay in bed, or to use unhealthy coping mechanisms like substance use.

Using Opposite Action, you can:

First, acknowledge the emotion (depression, sadness, hopelessness, etc.) and the action urges associated.
Then, ask yourself if expressing the emotion in this way would be effective. Would these actions make you feel better?
If not, use Opposite Action – do an action that’s the direct opposite of the action urge. For this example, some possibilities might be to reach out to friends, get out of bed, or avoid substances.
Repeat Opposite Action until the emotion changes.

4. Reframe unhelpful and negative thoughts

Endogenous depression: when your mind turns against you. Negative thoughts often get in the way of motivation, especially when you live with depression. Depression can cause you to fall into unhelpful thinking traps.

You might have thoughts like:

I’m a loser.
I’m so lazy. I barely did anything today.
Why can’t I just get up and do this?
Even if I do this, it won’t make a difference.
Nothing will ever make me feel better.
My friends don’t want to see me anyway.

However, these thinking patterns are not rooted in objective truth, and can cause a lack of motivation to become even worse. It’s important to know how to challenge and reframe these thoughts that are getting in your way.

For example, you could reframe the above thoughts as:

I’m just a human being with a mental health condition. I’m doing my best.
I was able to brush my teeth and shower today. That’s an accomplishment.
Depression is making me feel a lack of motivation. It’s important to be kind to myself.
Based on scientific research as well as my own past experiences, I know that if I go spend time in nature, I may feel better.
I have depression, but depression is manageable. There are effective treatments out there that have been found to help.
I have no evidence that my friends don’t want to see me. They have only ever shown me love and support.

5. Use behavioral activation

Behavioral activation is a cognitive-behavioral (CBT) technique based on the idea that often, behavior precedes emotion. In other words, you might feel now like you’re too depressed to do anything – you don’t want to see friends, exercise, or go outside.

Behavioral activation teaches that you don’t need to wait for an emotion to change your behavior. In other words, you don’t need to “feel” like doing it to do it. Often, the behavior comes first – if you can see friends, exercise, or go outside even while feeling depressed, then you’re likely to feel better afterwards.

This is helpful for people with depression, because depression and motivation often get locked in a vicious, self-perpetuating cycle. You don’t feel the desire to exercise or socialize when you’re depressed, so you don’t. But the longer you go without these healthy habits, the worse you feel – and you’re even less likely to engage in these habits.

6. Connect with a supportive environment

Endogenous depression: when your mind turns against you. One of the best things you can do for your overall mental health is to connect with supportive people. Research shows that people who feel their environments are supportive are more likely to be motivated. .

In other words, you’re more likely to feel motivated when your closest loved ones are around you, cheering you on.

It’s important not to give into the temptation to isolate when you live with depression. Remember the behavioral activation technique – even if you don’t feel the desire to connect with others, doing it anyway can change your emotions.

Reach out to loved ones. Schedule time to call them or spend time with them. Let them know your goals, and ask them to keep you accountable. This can help you stay motivated.

7. Reward yourself for small steps

It’s important to be your own cheerleader when it comes to depression. Celebrate every win, even the smallest ones. Reframe any negative thoughts that tell you that these small steps don’t count. Every step counts when you’re battling depression.

For example, maybe you’re in a depressive episode and have the goal of going to the gym and running 5 miles. You’re able to change into your gym clothes but feel too unmotivated and depressed to actually drive to the gym.

It’s easy to judge yourself for this. You may have thoughts like, “I’m a failure. I didn’t meet my goal.” But these thoughts are likely to only make you more depressed. Instead, reframe and affirm yourself for the step you did take: “I was able to change into gym clothes. That’s more than I could do yesterday.”

8. Seek professional help for depression and motivation

Lastly, don’t forget that depression is a chronic health condition that requires treatment just like any other.

Often, when we’re depressed, we tend to judge ourselves as “just lazy.” We may think we should be motivated and pull ourselves out of depression with sheer willpower.

It’s not your fault that you live with depression, and you deserve support.

A therapist can help address underlying depression using tools like cognitive-behavioral therapy and acceptance and commitment therapy.

In therapy, you can learn different ways to manage depression symptoms and build an activity plan that you can stick to even when depression causes a complete lack of motivation.

Sum It All Up

Endogenous depression: when your mind turns against you. Having endogenous depression isn’t the end of the world, although it feels like it. Remember, if you ever hit rock bottom, there’s only one way to go, and that is up.

If you keep practicing the motivational skills listed above, eventually you’ll get to the point where you’re feeling good about yourself.

Then, it’s only uphill from there. I’m not saying everyday is going to be perfect, but you’ll begin enjoying life again and that is the point.

So, practice these motivational strategies, and hopefully your life will turn around. They helped me, and I truly hope they work for you. Peace and always love. Until next time…

Articles About Endogenous Depression

Endogenous vs. Exogenous Depression: What Are the Differences?

Endogenous Depression

What Does Endogenous Depression Mean?

What to know about endogenous depression

Have a Good One,

Cindee Murphy
“One Voice Affected By Endogenous Depression”

“I found that with depression, one of the most important things you could realize is that you’re not alone.” — Dwayne Johnson

“You say you’re ‘depressed’ – all I see is resilience. You are allowed to feel messed up and inside out. It doesn’t mean you’re defective – it just means you’re human.” ― David Mitchell, Cloud Atlas

“I go through a lot of depression, and I know other people do, too, but I have an outlet that so many people don’t. If you have that inside of you and can’t get it out, what do you do?” – Billie Eilish

“A big part of depression is feeling really lonely, even if you’re in a room full of a million people.” — Lilly Singh

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